Life and Pain
by Cpt. Ritter
Summary: Direct sequel to Life and Death! Can Teyla overcome the pain of John's death and continue on with her life?
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: This is a direct continuation of Life and Death, all the previous conditions still apply._

Teyla stood alone on the control room balcony. Two days had passed since John's death and she still couldn't deal with the pain. It hurt more than any physical wound. It was a blind, numbing pain that wouldn't ever go away. It was all internal. To anyone else, it would seem that she was merely distant.

She glanced at the ring on her finger. It was a symbol of the love she had for him, and his love in return. It was the one remaining tangible thing she had of John Sheppard in the world. She placed her ring to her mouth, leaning heavily upon the balcony. As if trying to conjure up some feeling of his presence, his gentle touch.

Inside, she felt colder than any winter she'd ever experienced. She felt hollow. She still remembered the funeral. It would be the memory she could never shake. She tried to think of a happy memory. Instead, she found herself reliving his death over and over again. She felt herself reliving the pain of watching him slip away as he said, "I love you."

The numbness inside grew. She allowed the tears to fall. One by one, the hot tears streamed down her cheeks. Each of her tears seemed to further take another part of her soul away. She forced herself to stop. She didn't want to lose anything anymore. All she wanted, was to have some kind of peace.

She stepped back into the control room and down the main stairs. She ducked into the side passage and down the hall. A few people noticed her, but thankfully no one tried to talk to her. She continued down the hall to the transporter.

She ducked around a plump scientist and into the transporter. She took it to her section of the city's living areas. She ducked silently into her room, locking the door behind her. She released all the control she built up and lay down on her bed. There, she encircled her pillow with her arms and let each and every one of the tears fall.

XXX

Aiden Ford stepped into Doctor Weir's office. He knew what this was about. Elizabeth had asked him to keep an eye on Teyla during their missions. He knew that Elizabeth was worried. He also knew that Teyla need the missions as a focus. He knew he needed them too.

Elizabeth was sitting behind her desk, looking over reports. She glanced up as he entered. "Aiden, please sit down." Her voice hadn't been the same since John had died.

He took the seat in front of her desk. He felt like he was under a spotlight. "You're wondering how Teyla's holding up?"

Elizabeth nodded in response.

"She's holding together, but that's about it."

"And you?"

"I'm okay. It's just not the same without Colonel Sheppard." Aiden closed his eyes for a minute, blocking out the memories that still plagued him.

"I don't think it ever will be."

"Am I dismissed mam?"  
"Yes Aiden, go ahead."

Aiden stood up and quickly left the room. He knew he'd left out just how far gone Teyla really was. He'd seen how all the fire had been burnt out of her. He remembered holding her trembling body as she cried into his shoulder. He hadn't seen her cry since the funeral, but he knew she hadn't healed. He knew that deep down inside, a wound had yet to be healed. He frowned. He didn't think it could be healed.

He stepped down the stairs and headed down the corridor. He headed straight for the transporter and took it to Teyla's room. He knew he owed it to her to try and help. He wasn't sure what he could do, but he had to try. He stopped at her door. Listening carefully, he could hear the muffled sounds of Teyla crying.

He felt a sharp pain in his heart, almost like a knife driving in it. He stopped. He wasn't sure if he should interrupt her. He reached for the door and stopped again. Did he really have anything to say that would help? Did he really have any reason to believe he could even hope to help her in this?

He knocked twice. He immediately heard the crying stop. He wasn't surprised. Teyla hadn't shown to anyone just how much pain she was in. He knew better. He'd seen the fire be burnt out of her on John's death. He'd felt it: in both the way she acted and the way she dealt with people.

A few seconds later Teyla opened the door. She looked composed. Her hair was tied back in a loose, if a bit messy, ponytail. There wasn't a tear to be seen on her face. He looked into her eyes, they told a whole world of hidden emotion. He could see the redness from crying. He could see the barely held back tears. He could see how she stood shorter than she had before.

"Aiden please, come in." She forced a very fake smile.

He chose not to mention just how much he saw. He stepped in and sat down at the small table in the corner. She poured them both a cup a tea. A very strong cup, he realized as he drank it. "Are you alright Teyla?" He asked.

"I am fine Lieutenant." Her voice was harsh, he'd touched a nerve. He also noticed how she called him Lieutenant.

Aiden decided he'd better push, for both their benefit. "No you're not Teyla. You're doing a good job hiding it, but I can see the pain. Believe me, I know the pain."

To his relief, she didn't become angry. She simply closed her eyes and slouched in her chair. "It hurts." She said after a moment of silence. She dipped her head and let the tears fall. "No matter what I do; no matter how hard I try to forget; it always hurts."

Aiden wasn't sure how to respond. He knew how she felt, though not as deeply as she did. Pain like that was life changing—it either made you stronger or it destroyed you. He wasn't sure what was happening to Teyla, but he was pretty sure if she couldn't pull herself together, it would destroy her.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Reviews are much appreciated, keep the encouragement coming and I'll work on my end of the bargain. By the way, stuff starts to get a little... dark... in spots, don't shoot me._

Teyla shifted uncomfortably in her bed. It was early in the mourning, and she hadn't slept at all. She hadn't slept since he died. It hurt to much, all she could dream about was him dying.

She willed herself to get up and go the her bathroom. Once there, she opened her sparring pack. She withdrew the small canister of pills. They weren't sleeping pills, they were stimulants. She needed to be strong.

No one knew, no one would know about her use of the stimulants. If she was ever discovered, she would be outcast from her people. She downed two of the pills with a small cup of water. This allowed her to get through her day.

She tied her hair back loosely in a ponytail, then dressed in her full uniform. She felt the energy swirl into her body as the pills took effect. All traces of fatigue disappeared before she set foot outside her room.

She walked down the hall at her usual brisk pace. The stimulants gave her focus. They gave her enough of a boost to concentrate. She began her day with no one the wiser about what she did.

XXX

Carson Beckett sat in his office. He was supposed to be typing up a report on the other day's patients. Two marines were still in the infirmary with some nasty injuries.

He was lucky no one had died. He still remembered desperately trying to keep John Sheppard alive. He was also trying to track down why he'd lost two canisters of stimulants. He'd checked the reports, but he couldn't figure out why anyone would steal them.

He rubbed his forehead just as Elizabeth walked in. She was carrying a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and another in the other. She offered him the second cup.

"Looks like you could use it." She said with a small smile.

"Aye, that I could." Carson replied, sipping from the hot coffee. "I was just tryin' to finish my reports."

Elizabeth glanced at the computer screen. "Doesn't look like you're doing too well."  
"I'm just findin' it hard. This is the part of the report where I have to talk about how Colonel Sheppard died."  
Elizabeth's expression hardened slightly. "I couldn't even begin to offer you suggestions."

"I don't think we've even begun to see the ramifications of his death yet. On top of all this, I'm missing two canisters of stimulants."

"Really?" Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. "That's it?"

"Aye, it doesn't make any bloody sense. I don't even know who would do such a thing."

"Should I have Sergeant Bates look into it?"

"I don't think it can hurt. I'm still thinkin' it's just a case of someone on the Daedalus not being careful enough."

"You don't think it was stolen?"  
"I don't know a person in the city I would suspect for such a theft. Or what they'd do with it."

"I'll have Bates look into it." She placed a hand on his shoulder. "It wasn't your fault."

Deep down inside, Carson knew it wasn't his fault, but he felt like he should've been able to do something. He felt like he should've been able to save John Sheppard.


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: If you're wondering about how Sheppard died, then READ my other story, Life and Death. You can find it on my profile. (Electric Trekker, this means you)_

Teyla stepped through the gate behind Aiden. Their mission was to investigate the planet of P93-552. The planet didn't look in habited, but the MALP had spotted ruins in the distance. Aiden checked his compass and then silently led them through the trees to the ruins.

The planet was a forested world. Large coniferous and deciduous trees were all the eye could see in all directions. Teyla followed Rodney through the trees. She had her P90 raised in a ready position. All around her the world seemed to be on edge, as if waiting for something to happen.

"It is too quiet." Teyla said.

"It's an uninhabited planet." Rodney replied. "What do you expect?"

"Shut up McKay." Aiden snapped. "It does seem odd."

Teyla silently thanked Aiden for his support. He had been her strongest supporter since John had died. "There should be at least some local animals."

"Maybe, maybe not." Rodney replied. "We're in another galaxy."

"You are Doctor McKay. I am not."

Thankfully, Rodney stopped talking after Teyla made that comment. Teyla let them continue on in silence.

They reached the ruins in after a few minutes of walking through the trees. Once there they realized that they weren't alone. A group of Genii were already in the ruins. Teyla was transported back to their previous encounter with the Genii.

She remembered what Koyla had forced John to do. It was only luck that John hadn't died using the device. Pain surged through her soul as the memories consumed her. She felt her knees give way and the barely suppressed tears start to fall.

Aiden instantly held her up. He helped to move her back behind a tree. "Teyla, you okay?"

Teyla breathed deeply, trying to force the images out of her mind. "I will be okay."

"What should we do about the Genii?"  
"There's only a handful of them, can't you just make them surrender." Rodney suggested.

"Possibly." Aiden allowed. "The question is do we want to."

"This is really Colonel Sheppard's field." Rodney sat down on the ground. "This is what he was really good at." Rodney blinked, suppressing a tear.

Teyla buried her emotions deep in her stomach and faced Aiden. "We must stop them."

"Give me a few minutes to recon the area." Aiden said. "You two, stay here." Aiden jogged off into the bushes.

Rodney leaned against a tree across from Teyla. "Wouldn't you normally go with him." He added.

"Doctor Weir doesn't trust me." Teyla said without emotion. "I am starting to believe that Aiden doesn't either."

"I don't think that has anything to do with it. Ford's struggling with trying to deal with Sheppard's command. He isn't ready for this, you aren't ready for this, and, surprising as it sounds, I'm not ready for this."

Aiden crept from the bushes. "There's only three Genii that I can count. Only one of them is armed."

"Then we should take them." Teyla said.

Aiden rubbed his forehead. "Yeah, we'd better. McKay, stay here. Teyla, you're with me."

Aiden led Teyla over the ridge. They kept the structure between them and the Genii. Once they reached the wall that the Genii were behind, they split up and converged on opposite sides.

Teyla whirled around the corner and yelled. "DO NOT MOVE!"

The Genii immediately stopped what they were doing. The one armed soldier glanced at her and dropped his gun.

"Hands behind your heads." Aiden yelled.

All three Genii placed their hands on the back of their heads. Aiden and Teyla tied all three of the Genii soldiers hands behind their backs and then lined them up against the wall. Teyla guarded them while Rodney and Aiden tried to figure out what they'd been doing.

One of the Genii snickered. "So you're the infamous Teyla Emmagen. Where's your leader... Sheppard."

Teyla turned and fixed him with a cold stare. "You will not mention him again."

He must've seen the tears that were barely contained in Teyla's eyes. He smiled. "What I would've given to have been there when he died."

Teyla hands began to shake. She drew her knife and pressed it against his throat. "Do not... try to anger me." She said with a heartless voice.

"What are you going to do? Kill me." He laughed.

The violent urge took over and Teyla couldn't stop herself as she slit his throat open. Blood oozed everywhere. Blood covered her hands and feet as she stood their stunned by what she had just done. She threw the knife to the ground and screamed.

The two other Genii took off before Aiden and Rodney found Teyla kneeling on the ground, her hand covered in blood. The Genii soldier's blood oozing out onto the ground from his corpse.

"What the hell happened?" Aiden yelled.

Teyla couldn't reply. She was shaking from head to toe. She wasn't a murderer. She knew she wasn't. But all she could see was the blood pouring from the Genii's throat. It had all happened so fast. She didn't know what she would do.

Rodney gasped as he realized what had happened. "Oh my god. His throat's been cut open."

Aiden grabbed Teyla and pulled her to her feet. "What the hell happened Teyla?" He shook her.

She couldn't meet his eyes, she couldn't respond. She knew that he already knew the answer, and that because of it, he'd probably be condemning her to a fate worse than death. It would be a fate away from Atlantis. Doctor Weir would never trust her now.

"McKay." Aiden yelled. "Let's get the hell out of here."

"But what about..." Rodney stuttered.

"Leave it!" Aiden forced Teyla to start running towards the gate, keeping her in front of him.


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: Many thanks for all the reviews, it keeps me going._

Teyla stepped through the gate first. She tried to hide her hand behind her P90. It was only partially successful.

"What happened Teyla?" Elizabeth asked. "You'd better go see Carson."

Teyla mumbled something incoherently before walking away. She didn't head for the infirmary. Instead, she darted into the nearest transporter and took it a small secluded spot far outside the bounds of the occupied area of Atlantis. She dropped her P90 in the hallway just outside the balcony.

The balcony was only a few inches above the water. She dipped her blood soaked hand into it. The blood washed away and disappeared, at least physically. She then stuck her boots into the water and rinsed them off. She glanced over her mission gear, they were clean enough.

She slipped her boots from her feet and took her socks off. She then pulled up her pant legs and let her feet dangle off the edge of the balcony. It brought back the best memories. If she looked quickly enough, she could almost she John sitting next to her.

They'd spent an entire night out here once. It had been the most enjoyable time of her life. She'd never felt so content before in her life. The tears started to fall, she really needed John now.

Then the face of the soldier she had just murdered rose to the surface of her thoughts. She immediately pulled her feet from the water. She pulled herself up into a ball against the wall, tucking her legs in close and cried. She was a murderer; she'd failed to honor John's memory; the pain was just too much.

XXX

Aiden nervously stepped into Elizabeth's office. "Doctor... may I come in?" He asked nervously.

Elizabeth frowned, obviously catching onto his nervousness. "What's bothering you Aiden?"

"It's Teyla mam." He hated himself for what he was about to do. "I don't think she's stable."

"What do you mean? I know she's in pain but..."  
"Yes mam, she's in pain. But it's not the kind of pain you can walk away from. She slit the Genii soldier's throat, while he was tied and unarmed."

Elizabeth stared at him dumbfounded before swallowing. "That couldn't have been Teyla."

"It was, the blood on her hands wasn't hers, it was his."

Elizabeth was going to respond when Carson walked into her office. "Have you all see Teyla?"

"She didn't report to the infirmary?" Elizabeth asked.

"No and no one's seen her in the last thirty minutes."

Elizabeth tapped her ear piece radio. "Bates assemble a search team and begin searching the city for Teyla."

"That's not necessary." Aiden stated defensively.

"You just finished telling me that we have a mentally unstable Teyla that's in some unknown part of the city. How do you expect me to react?"

"I have an idea where she went. All I ask is that you let McKay and I go alone."

"Take stunners, I want Teyla brought to the infirmary for Carson and Heightmeyer to look her over." Elizabeth turned towards the back of her office and motioned for Aiden to go.

Aiden took off at a sprint. "Come on McKay." He said to the bungling scientist as he passed through the control room.

Rodney immediately stopped what he was doing and chased after Aiden. The two of them reported to the armory.

Aiden quickly grabbed a pair of hand-held wraith stunners. He handed one to Rodney. "We've got to get to Teyla first."

For once in his life, Rodney McKay said nothing. He simply nodded.

Aiden raced to the end of the hall and into the transporter. Rodney was a few steps behind. Aiden looked at the map of the city. John had told them of the place he and Teyla went to when they needed to be alone. Aiden pressed the panel.

The doors closed and then opened, only they were in a darkened passageway. Aiden cautiously stepped out. He then walked slowly to the end of the hallway. At the end of the hallway was Teyla's P90, laying discarded on the floor.

Aiden glanced at McKay. "Leave the stunners." Aiden set his stunner on the floor.

"You sure that's a good idea?" Rodney asked. "I mean, if she's mentally unstable..."

"Then bringing weapons isn't a good idea. We've got to be friends McKay. She deserves that much."

"Right, I didn't think of that." Rodney placed his stunner on the floor.

Aiden took a deep breath before stepping out onto the balcony. He instantly spotted Teyla. She was curled into a ball against the wall. He could hear her quiet sobs. He instantly felt terrible about what was happening. He stopped a respectful distance from her. "Teyla?"

She glanced up before shuddering. "Leave me alone Aiden." Her voice was distance and horse.

Aiden risked sitting down next to her. "You don't have to do this alone Teyla."

Rodney sat down on the other side of her. "We're here." He said, unusually unsure of himself.

"I am a murderer." She spat at them.

"That is in no way true!" Rodney replied instantly. "I mean... you... did kill him, but he probably deserved it and..."

"You're not helping McKay." Aiden said quietly. He turned to Teyla and extended a hand. "We're here for you Teyla."

Teyla leaned into his shoulder and her tears streamed anew. Aiden slowly placed a hand around her shoulder. His heart painfully reminded him just how much it hurt not to have John here.

"Shouldn't we be getting back." McKay suggested.

"We'll stay as long as we have to." Aiden replied. "We owe it to her."

"Uhhh... right."


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: Sorry it's been awhile. The story kinda ran away from me. Shouldn't be too long now till the end, I hope._

Cold, it was so very cold. Teyla shifted out of Aiden's sleeping arms. She felt like her body was frozen. She remembered why. She needed energy. She needed the strength to forget. It all hurt so much.

She ran silently away from Aiden and Rodney, away from everyone. She ducked into the transporter and took it to her room. She quickly downed a pair of stimulants. She forced herself to take several calming breaths as the energy flowed once again unchecked through her system.

She stepped silently out onto the balcony, letting her slow footfalls control the beating of her heart. She wished she didn't have one. Every day since John had died had burned the pain into her soul. Every day was like living a nightmare.

She turned to find a rather menacing Sergeant Bates standing in her doorway. He held a wraith stunner in his hands. "What were those pills you took?" He asked her.

Teyla was caught aback. "Get out." She spat.

"Or what?" Bates glared at her, raising his stunner slightly.

Teyla surged forward, taking Bates completely by surprise. She knocked his stunner out of his hands then landed her fist into his face. Bates rolled back, trying to get away from her.

Teyla stepped out into the hallway, and was instantly shot by a pair of marines. The stunner blasts caused her to lose all control and wither into a heap on the floor.

XXX

Aiden jogged into the infirmary. "What the hell happened?" He yelled at Bates, who was standing in a guard position just beyond Teyla's bed.

"She attacked me." Bates spat out in reply.

"Get the hell out of here." Aiden didn't wait to see if Bates actually obeyed his order or not. He walked straight up to Carson, who was conversing quietly with Elizabeth.

"Aww good you're here Lieutenant." Carson glanced at his datapad. "I think it was a mistake to put her back on active duty."

"Why?" Aiden asked, completely in the dark.

"No Carson, it was my decision. I thought it would help her cope." Elizabeth replied.

"What's going on?" Aiden said, slightly more forceful.

"Teyla being taking stimulants." Carson shook his head. "I think she was trying to forget."

"Is she dependent on them?"  
"I've got her sedated, and she hasn't been on them long enough to form a physical dependency, but mentally..." He shook his head. "... I just don't know what to do."

"Is there anything I can do?" Aiden said, realizing just how much he wasn't ready for this.

"Aside from being there for her when she wakes up, not much. I'm hoping the drugs'll clear from her system quickly." Carson walked back into his office.

Aiden pulled up a chair next to Teyla's bed. He would wait, he owed her his life and more. As he sat there he began to try and understand exactly what Teyla was going through, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized he couldn't understand. She had just lost someone she cared for more than anyone in the world.

He'd only been sitting for a few minutes when Kate Heightmeyer walked in. The blond doctor pulled up a chair next to him. "How is she?" Kate asked.

"Not good." Aiden replied.

"When I first met Teyla, it was because Colonel Sheppard had told me that I should talk to her. I don't think Teyla liked me."  
"It wasn't against you personally."

"I've come to realize that. Teyla felt betrayed by Colonel Sheppard because she'd confided in him."

"Maybe, that's the past. Right now, Teyla would kill if it would bring him back. How can it get this bad? You're the shrink."

Kate glanced down and placed her hands in her lap. "I can't really do it justice. Teyla is suffering from the kind of grief you just don't forget. She loved Colonel Sheppard. I think she took the pills to give her the strength to go on."

"Teyla can't see herself as weak, she's always been strong." Aiden said distantly.

"I don't think Teyla's slept at all in the last few days. I'm not sure she can."

"I just thought she'd cry herself to sleep."

Kate glanced at Teyla. "With as much pain as she's carrying around, I don't think even that remedy would work. She's afraid to sleep because she doesn't want the pain of realizing Colonel Sheppard isn't there." Kate paused. "That's all I can really help you with. If you need anything, I'll be in my office." Kate stood to leave.

"Thanks doc." Aiden replied, shifting his gaze to watch the doctor leave, then turning back to Teyla. Kate was right about one thing, Teyla was in pain. That much Aiden knew.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: LAST CHAPTER_

Teyla jolted awake, sitting up instantly, screaming John's name. Instantly Aiden's hand came to her shoulder, drawing her gaze to him. "It's okay." He said, gentle pushing her back down onto the bed.

The infirmary was dark and quiet. Rodney was asleep in one of the bed across from the Teyla's. Aiden sat in the chair next to her bed. He looked tired but he was awake.

"Are you alright?"

Teyla turned away, not meeting his gaze. She couldn't, it hurt too much.

He took her hand in his. "Teyla, I can't help you if you don't let me."

Teyla still refused to turn towards him, silent sobs shook her body as she suppressed the inner pain that tormented her. She wasn't deserving of friends like Aiden.

"Talk to me Teyla." Aiden said, pleading with her.

Teyla finally turned back towards him, he face wet with tears. Her eyes held a thousand emotions. "I've failed John." She croaked.

"What do you mean?" Aiden said, not understanding.

"How can I honor his memory if..." Teyla couldn't finish, fresh tears streaming down her face. "... if I cannot learn to live without him."

He took a Kleenex from the from the box next to the bed and wiped away some of the tears on her face. "I honestly don't know how to respond." Aiden replied, shaking his head.

Rodney stirred, then sat up. "What time is it?" He shook his head, seeing that Teyla was awake. He walked over to her bed, sitting down next to Aiden.

"You are fortunate." Teyla croaked, sniffling from crying.

"Do you think this is easy for me?" Rodney said, harsher than he should have. "I just lost the only person who's ever had any confidence in me!" Rodney's emotional barricade collapsed and the first tear streamed down his face.

Something in that tear hit home for Teyla. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I have been selfish."  
"No you haven't." Aiden replied.

"Yes I have." She moaned.

"Don't be ridiculous." Rodney quipped. "His death hurt us all, but the point is we can get past it, for John's sake.

Teyla nodded. "It does not make the pain go away.

"Nothing ever will." Aiden said quietly.

Fot the first time in days, Teyla smiled. She was glad she had friends like Aiden and Rodney, together, they could get through this.

XXX

Teyla shifted uncomfortably in her bed. She had been sleeping, but not soundly. Some progress had been made against the pain. It no longer numbed her to the point in which she couldn't feel anything, but it still hurt.

She glanced around her darkened room and could've sworn she saw someone. Her mind instantly became alert. She stood up slowly and began walking towards her bathroom.

She had gone two steps when she finally saw who it was. Standing there, in a blue dress shirt, rolled up sleeves, and khaki pants was John Sheppard. Her heart seemed to stop. Even time seemed to stop.

She stood in stunned silence, her knees buckling. She didn't know if she was dreaming or not. She didn't care if it was a dream. If it didn't involve watching him die, she would gladly live it.

Finally, her knees did give way. His hands shot out and held her up, pulling her into his arms. The tears fell, but for the first time since he had died, they were tears of happiness.

"How?" She asked after several minutes of just making sure he was there.

He regarded her with an unreadable expression. "I'm different now." He said softly.

She glanced into his eyes, there was something different about his expression. He seemed older. "Then you truly are dead." For some reason it didn't bother her anymore.

"No." He responded quickly. "I ascended."

"Then you are like the ancestors?"

"More or less. I haven't left your side since I became what I am."

"But how?" Teyla couldn't understand.  
"Remember Chaya? She is the one who helped me to ascend.

Teyla's vision narrowed, remembering the ancient that had taken John's heart away from her, forcing her to realize just how much she had fallen for him.

"My own stubbornness." He smirked. "I just felt something was left undone. Then I realized that I was dead, and that I wasn't coming back."

"But you are back." Teyla protested.

"I can't stay." John's voice was sad. "Believe me, I want to."

"Then kiss me, once last time." Teyla pleaded, not wanting to let go.

John smirked. "I can go one better." His body seemed to shimmer and turn into a brilliant white light. Awareness blossomed in Teyla as his mind and essence poured into her and she into him.

It was a more loving embrace then she could ever hope for. In that moment, time did stop and all that mattered was that she could finally share everything she felt for John Sheppard.

He reformed after what seemed like an eternity. "I have to go." He said, motioning towards the balcony.

Teyla threw her arms around him one last time. "One day I will join you." She said. "Until that day, know that I will always love you."  
"I know, and you know I feel the same way." He shook his head. "I doubt I'll ever be able to talk to you again."

"At least we were able to say goodbye." Teyla replied.

"Yeah. I love you Teyla." He disappeared in a glowing light and flew out the window.

Teyla walked out to the balcony. "Wherever you go John Sheppard, I will always love you." She said. A gentle wind blew threw her hair. She knew it was John. He truly was always with her. Someday, they'd be together again.

_A/N: Hope I brought some tears to your eyes, I'm planning on writing a final chapter Life and Rebirth eventually, but I'm not sure when I'll get to it._

_-Cpt. Ritter_


End file.
